Posts tagged satire

Zomney 2012: He needs brains!

Dispatches from Post-Liberty America: Day One

Hello? Is anybody still out there?

It’s been a rough 24 hours since the Murder of Liberty—and I’m sending this message out into the void in the desparate hope that somewhere some of the other Sons of Liberty have managed to avoid the storm troopers. If you get this message—you are not alone. Some of us are still surviving in the hellscape. We have enough clean water for weeks—though they’ve taken away all our guns.

One of my companions was sick, probably dying from an infected cut. Eventually the broadcasts got to him. He went to get Obamacare. The penicillin had microchips in it. That’s how they found us. That’s how they got the guns.

If you get this—reblog immediately. We’ve uncovered evidence of how they got to the Chief. We’re pretty sure one of The Plumbers went by his house and put Koolaid in his tap water. Don’t fall victim yourself. Drink only rain water and pure grain alcohol.

Stay safe—and stay free.